The quality of your life equals the quality of your relationships. Rewards profoundly effect perspective as well as the way individuals interact with one another. If you want to change your life, you must change the way you reward yourself and others.
Foundational Rule of Rewards
The laws of nature and nature’s God never change.
This foundational law deals with rewards:
You always get more of what you reward and less of what you punish.
Government is the way it is because of what is rewarded.
Education is the way it is because of what is rewarded.
“Church” is the way it is because of what is rewarded.
Your marriage is the way it is because of what is rewarded.
Your finances are the way they are because of what is rewarded.
Your kids and critters are the way they are because of what is rewarded.
Here’s an example:
A Story About Rewards and The Barking Dog
What’s your attention worth? I discovered this story…
A man wanted his dog to stop barking. He tried everything, but nothing worked. Finally, he heard about a dog trainer who was supposed to be a miracle worker. He called the trainer and explained his problem. The trainer said he could help, but it would cost $500. The man was desperate, so he agreed. The trainer came to the man’s house, took out a hammer and a nail, and hammered the nail into the fence. The dog started barking. The trainer gave the man a bill for $500 and left. The man was furious. He called the trainer and demanded an explanation. The trainer calmly replied, “The dog was barking because he wanted your attention. Now he has it.”
Someone with unlimited cash could hire a live-in dog trainer, which means the dog will bond with the paid trainer.
You Must Know What Result You Want
What does the owner of the barking dog want most? Relationship or quiet? Whatever he rewards, he’ll get more of that.
Bark for attention.
When it works, you can expect more barking because dogs are savvy critters.
How curious that we’re slow to the party, when every dog, horse, muskrat, and snake understands this principle.
Focus is Critical
The issue is about focus, and giving your dog a better way to get your attention, If your dog wants attention, consider offering a better option to your dog than barking, like bringing you a specific toy. Reward the RIGHT behavior with 5 minutes of your time and TOTAL focus. If you’re consistent the quality of your life will change for the better. Your dog will be happier, too.
Over thirty-plus years as a horse “trainer”, I discovered that horses and dogs are often better people trainers than people are horse and dog trainers.
Animals and Weeds Understand The Law of Rewards
We’ve established that animals get it. But, even dandelions understand the law of rewards and punishments. What you fertilize grows and what you punish/poison dies.
Note: Punishment is only used properly when there’s a behavior you want to extinguish, as in ‘kill’, like a noxious weed. Punishing barking can kill barking. Do that, and your dog will watch an intruder enter your home in silence…
Do not be deceived: God cannot be mocked. A man reaps what he sows.
The Principle of Cause and Effect
In this verse Paul confirms the principle of cause and effect. It suggests that what you sow, or reward, is what you reap in return. If you sow good deeds, you’ll reap positive outcomes.
If you don’t like some aspect of your life today, consider what you’re rewarding. Most folks don’t connect negatives with rewards. For example: If your kids repeatedly do something that irritates you, figure out why it works for them. Somehow, they’re being rewarded or they wouldn’t keep doing it.
When someone does something you appreciate or want more of, TELL THEM! Whether it’s a direct, “I appreciate you so much” or just confirmation, “That’s beautiful. You’re so creative.” Even a simple smile or touch is packed with power.
Want to change your life?
Change what you reward.
If you want to change the culture, you have to change the reward system.
